Once upon a time, there was a beautiful pink dolphin named Sparkles. She lived off the coast of Bermuda with all her dolphin friends. She had great fun each day, doing the things that dolphins do – chasing fish, teasing sea turtles and playing with her friends. Life was pretty good. If a little uncomfortable.
The only annoying thing about Sparkles’ life was when it was time to go to the bathroom. Instead of the green poop all her friends produced – Sparkles’ poop was kind of clear and sparkly and hard instead of soft. It hurt a bit but at least it was prettier than everyone else’s poo. In fact, her glittery, sparkly poop inspired her name.
Sparkles and her friends didn’t see many humans. But one day, a couple of divers came out to explore the coral where Sparkles spent most of her time playing. Sparkles and her friends teased them a bit and tried to get the divers to play games. But the divers had noticed some of Sparkles poop and were more interested in it than a bunch of playful dolphins. Sparkles thought that was really weird. Why would the humans want to play with poo? Isn’t that a little gross?
The divers picked up some of the poo and brought it up to their boat. Sparkles and her friends followed them up to see why they had picked up Sparkles’ poo.
The divers were very, very excited! They kept exclaiming, “Diamonds! We found diamonds!” to each other. The one in the red suit told his friend, “We must have stumbled on a shipwreck! We have to see more!”
The dolphins laughed at the stupid humans. Confusing shipwreck treasure with Sparkles poop – what morons. No wonder humans are considered one of the stupidest land creatures.
The divers came back the next day with a little more equipment. Sparkles and her friends followed them around. The other dolphins urged her to poop near the divers to see if it would get them all excited. The humans were thrilled to find another pile of poo. The dolphins laughed and laughed. They urged Sparkles to poop on the divers’ heads. She thought that wasn’t very nice but her friends eventually convinced her to do it. So she did.
The diver in the blue suit was shocked when he was hit on the head by a diamond! He and the other diver met back in the boat. “One of those dolphins must have flung it at you.” The diver in the blue suit insisted. “Dolphins love to play.”
Sparkles and her friends decided to really mess with the divers and show them exactly what they were dealing with. Sparkles swam between the two men and got their attention. As they were watching she made a big poo. The diver’s eyes got really big behind their masks and they reached out to grab it. Sparkles and her friends howled with laughter. “Stupid humans! They love poo!”
But to the human it wasn't poo it was diamonds. And diamonds are so pretty and worth so much money. So the human started following Sparkles around picking up the dolphin's poo because it was diamonds.
This went on for several days. The dolphins were starting to get a little annoyed. Sparkles didn’t really mind because they kept bringing her food. But they weren’t feeding the other dolphins which frustrated her friends. She tried to share but the divers got annoyed and tried to stop her. And each morning the men would come and pick up all the diamond droppings. After a few weeks, the divers finally realized it was better to feed all the dolphins then deal with Sparkles’ friends harassing them to get food. Things were good for the dolphins.And of course we have written more. Actually the next chapters were dictated to me by the kid. But I'll save those for another day.
But as we all know, things can’t be great forever. The dolphins were surprised one day when the men came with a weird contraption. They urged Sparkly to enter it by placing tasty treats in it. She went in. But she couldn’t get out! It turned out that the contraption was a cage!