Sunday, July 31, 2011

Sticky Fingers

Yesterday my 10-month-old nephew came to visit for the day After the kid got over the green eyed monster we had a lot of fun. Much later, after they had gone home and the kid should have been fast asleep we had the oddest conversation. She was complaining about how E gets lots and lots and lots and lots of attention, etc... I explained that babies do get a little more attention - mainly because we have to make sure they don't get themselves killed. That wasn't the weird part.
Kid: Babies have really sticky hands and feet. That means that they can climb the wall and even sit on the ceiling.
Me: Really?
Kid: Really!
Me: And where did you hear that?
Kid: I just know. Because when I was playing with him I touched his fingers and feet and they were really, really sticky?
Me: Couldn't that have been drool?
Thank goodness we're not having more kids! I don't think she could handle the "competition".

Saturday, July 30, 2011

And now we wait

I pulled out my old phone today and called up my cell phone company. Told them to ditch the data plan and reactivate my old phone.

I wonder how long it will be before they offer me a smart phone package? I've decided to wait until the iphone5 is released to replace my awol iphone. It seemed silly to get a new one when the prices will likely drop in 40 or so days!

Thursday, July 28, 2011

Dumb arse

So, I lost my iphone a couple of days ago. I suspect I dropped it at a store and it got pocketed by someone. I assume it is in someone else has it now because it has been turned off and there was lots of juice on the phone when I misplaced it. It's pretty hard to accidentally turn off the iphone.

I'm making my peace with this but the kid is not helping.

Yesterday she decided to play a trick on me and say, "I have your iphone, it is in my bookcase!" I don't know why she thought that would be funny. It really wasn't. And she can be a very convincing liar it seems. I'm not impressed. I think that may have finally gotten through to her. But hopefully it will convince hubby that playing "tricks" on the kid is not setting a good influence.

Monday, July 25, 2011

Math matters

Today it became very clear to me how important basic math skills. I already knew it but this experience really highlighted it.

Let me preface this with an explanation that math has never been my best subject. I took every math class twice in high school. I only failed once but I retook the classes so that I'd actually learn the concepts. I even took Calculus twice in university for that same reason. I barely passed the first time and I took it again and got a B+.

I don't use that much math in real life but I do add, subtract, calculate percentages and work out sales tax on a regular basis.

This morning I stopped at Walmart to get an item price matched. The Real Canadian Superstore (RCSS) is selling Xbox cards for $15 instead of $20 this week. This weekend they also offered no tax on everything in the store. The manager of the electronics section at Walmart helped me this morning. It took forever to get her to realize that no, the item is on sale for $15 - I don't save $5 from not paying the tax. That was wrong on several points:
  1. No tax on gift cards - ever. Hence, the RCSS  tax free savings didn't even apply to this item.
  2. Sales tax is 13% in Ontario. On a $20 item that would be $2.60. Not $5. The ad even specified that the item was on sale for $15 instead of $20 - a $5 savings!
She ended up calling over the store manager who looked at her like she had 3 heads and promptly told her to price match the $20 item for $15

Sunday, July 24, 2011


I've been doing some scrapbooking and I came across this bit of writing from 2009. Kid would have been 4 and a half at the time.

Something I thought wouldn’t happen for many more years (or even, hopefully, never) is the kid staggering around the house saying “I’m drunk! I’m drunk!”

Sadly, this actually happened and it took a long time to figure it out. Seeing as neither of us drink and we certainly don’t walk around saying, “I’m drunk.” We figure Pirates of the Caribbean – either the movie or the ride – was responsible. That or a grandparent.
And the funny thing is - we still aren't sure of the origin of her "drunkeness!"

Saturday, July 23, 2011

Stinky Pete

When I was little I would spend the summer at the cottage with my grandparents. I would see my parents on the weekends when they came up.

On one occasion my dad was horrified by my smell. I think I was 7 or 8. Grandma hadn't made me bathe all week because I'd spent so much time swimming. Her sense of smell isn't that great.

Imagine my laughter on discovering that my kid, who has also been up at the cottage all week with Grandpa, has also not bathed for a week! Luckily she doesn't smell that bad. Despite sleeping with the big stinky dog most nights.

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Canoes are awesome!

The kid is quite obsessed with canoes now. Crazy obsessed.

So obsessed that she thought a trip to the canoe museum with Grandpa was "beyond awesome!"

And incidentally when someone refers to Robin I'm no longer to think of my university roommate first. That is the name of our family canoe. I didn't even know it had a name!  It seems my Grandpa named it that years and years ago. Obviously I never shared my daughter's love of canoes. I did love my bright yellow kayak though.

Saturday, July 16, 2011


I only started drinking plain old water a few years ago. I always thought tap water tasted funny and even Brita filtered water didn't taste right.

Eventually I discovered that I really like some bottled water. And I like it at room temperature.

And then environmentalists got up in arms about all the bottled water people drink. Some places banned the sale of bottled water.

I've tried to drink tap water, but since it tastes odd, I don't drink as much as I'm supposed to. I end up drinking sugary beverages instead. And I really am sensitive to the taste of water. Even some bottled water tastes disgusting to me. While writing this post, I read that Dasani and Aquafina water - both of which I hate the taste of - is actually municipal tap water from a city in my region. I like Nestle water so maybe we just need to move to that community.

Until then, I will drink my bottled water and recycle the bottles. And feel bad for being environmentally unfriendly. But, I'm hydrated, which is what the doctor prescribed.

Friday, July 15, 2011

The tale of the mean mommy

Last night I let the kid stay up a bit late watching a Harry Potter movie. In anticipation of today's release. I didn't let her watch the whole thing.

That's not why she had a temper tantrum.

She had a fit because she wanted to take her book upstairs with her. I wouldn't allow her to because I actually wanted her to sleep - not read. And then there were tears.

She insisted that she wasn't going to sneak read. She was going to read it in the morning when she woke up before us. Cue parental laughter because she very rarely wakes up on her on on weekday mornings. However, just in case today turned out to be an exception, I told her I'd put the book in her room after she fell asleep.

And the hysterics continued. She must think I am an idiot.

Eventually she calmed down. She even explained that I should know that she wasn't going to read because if she was she would have snuck the book upstairs and hid it under her pillow. Funny, that's what I thought she was doing when I stopped her from bringing the book upstairs.

Incidentally, we had to drag her out of bed this morning.

Thursday, July 14, 2011

Dream on!

Today the kid started talking to me about our "next cruise". Considering how much I suffered on our first and only cruise I told her that I wasn't planning on going on another cruise in the foreseeable future.

My parents love cruising. So, I suggested to her that she convince Grandma and Grandpa B to take her on a cruise.
Kid: Oh! I already did. Grandma told me that if they won a Disney cruise and they couldn't give it away they'd take me!
 I highly doubt they'll ever win a Disney cruise. And I certainly hope they'd take the kid before giving it away to someone else!

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Really Handmade

So, the kid gave us a present yesterday for our anniversary. She emphasized the fact that it was handmade.

Yes, because I thought she bought the two pieces of cardboard stuck together at a store.

She then elaborated that her present was actually handmade. Unlike the cards that her Grandma makes. "She just gets her computer - Silhouette - to cut things out."

I think my daughter has become a craft snob.

Monday, July 11, 2011

A missed marketing opportunity

I loved Universal Studios. We all did. They even had a Simpsons section - complete with a Quik-E-Mart. The only problem was the gift store. It was pretty sparse. Especially when you consider the detail they put in the windows. When you advertise something by saying "It's like chocolate and bacon had a baby in your mouth" you really should sell bacon chocolate bars. But no. They just had t-shirts and the usual stuff you can buy at the mall. Ah well, taking photos was cheaper. :D

Sunday, July 10, 2011

Universal Studios is awesome!

In May, we went to Universal Studios before our cruise. We had a great time. It was very Disney except the rides were better and it was more compact. And, of course, there was the Wizarding World of Harry Potter.

We decided to stay at the Hard Rock Hotel. Why? Because it was:
  1. On Universal Property which meant we got to go to the front of the line on all but three rides
  2. The closest hotel to the theme parks
  3. Looked pretty cool
We went to Universal Studios after a swim in the huge pool. Our first destination was Shrek 4D. I was surprised that the pre-show actually scared the kid. She is normally unshakeable. The girl usually has no fear. And then we went on Jaws. This also terrified the kid. I suppose it shouldn’t surprise me that she thought they’d bring in a real man-eating shark for an amusement ride when she thought the real movies featured actors actually being eaten by sharks. Although, that didn’t concern her. 

Luckily she got over her “fear” quickly. She ended up loving the kid’s roller coaster so much that we let her ride it over and over and over again. By herself even.

And then we headed over to Islands of Adventure to visit The Wizarding World of Harry Potter. This area was surprisingly uncrowded. We ended up checking out the shops – Zonko’s, Honeydukes, Owl Post, and Dervish and Banges. We also lined up and watched the Ollivander`s show – twice. It is a short re-enactment of the scene from the first movie where Harry gets his wand but they use an audience member. She really wanted a wand and we hoped she would get picked so that we wouldn’t have to spend hours analyzing the different wands. Alas, she was not chosen so we spent at least an hour wand shopping. And we ate at The Three Broomsticks. Turns out none of us really like Butterbeer or Pumpkin fizz.

We were at Universal for three days. On our second day, kid convinced us to buy her Gryffindor robes. Guess what she is going to be for Halloween? We had her wear them on our last day. We lined up for Ollivander’s show again. She wasn’t chosen but she was told to stay behind after the official show. At this point Mr. Ollivander helped a wand choose her. I think they saw that we paid $99 to buy her a costume and figured it would be easy to sell us another $30 wand. It was.

I guess it isn’t too surprising that the kid keeps telling us that on our next family vacation she wants to go to Universal Studios.

Saturday, July 9, 2011


The kid just finished the fifth Harry Potter book, Order of the Phoenix. Tomorrow she comes home and she can get the Half-Blood Prince.

She told me that she's been practicing her spells all week at the cottage. But, she doesn't have either of her official wands. It's okay thought. She was practicing with a stick. And, just so you know her right hand is her wand hand.

And no, I'm not telling her about the midnight showing of the last movie this week. We'll take her sometime next weekend.

Friday, July 8, 2011

Child care

This past week the kid has been at the cottage with my parents. Next week she'll be at home. While we are at work she'll be in a day camp.

Not an overnight camp.

The 6-year-old thinks that we're sending her to an overnight camp. I have no idea where that idea came from. Well, actually, I do. I asked her if she wanted to join Brownies or Cubs in the fall. So, I'm guessing that she heard, "you're going to go to overnight camp next week!" instead of "Do you want to join Brownies or Cubs? It might mean you get to go camping at some point with your troop."

You can see how easy it is to make a mistake like that. Right?

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Look with your eyes!

The kid has been with my parents at the cottage for the last week. We've been talking to her everyday. Today when we called we discovered she was alone at the cottage. The parents were next door. Somehow it came out that she couldn't go next door with them because her shoes were wet. To be more specific, sopping.

I'm not stupid. I sent her up with three sets of shoes. Her runners, water shoes and Crocs. It seems she misplaced one of her Crocs. Then, as we were talking she found it... under the bed.
Mommy: Why didn't you look under the bed?
 Kid: I did!
Mommy: Did you use your eyes or your nose?
Kid: My nose!
Mommy: And that's why you couldn't find it.
See, even when she's away she drives me a little crazy.

Monday, July 4, 2011


This story is more hubby's than mine but, whatever.

He got to stay home for the 4th of July. While he was puttering around he heard a squeak from under the dishwasher. He moved everything and discovered a mouse under there. Damn it. Thought we'd destroyed the vermin when we were on our cruise. Came home to dead mouse in the mousetrap.  But, I digress.

Today, the mouse decided to hide from him but eventually he flushed it in to the open. Where our nice cat grabbed it and ran into the basement with it. He then watched her toss it around and tease it. It played dead. Luckily, hubby is smarter than a mouse. So, he caught it and drowned it. Better than our cat torturing it to death and leaving entrails everywhere.

He felt bad about killing the mouse but I assured him it was okay. After all, it's not like he bought humane traps and then drowned them. Like my mother used to.

Friday, July 1, 2011


Hubby and I were sitting and celebrating our 11th anniversary by watching 30 Rock when we heard a weird noise. There was evil cat standing on the couch gagging.

Yes, she decided to barf behind the couch. At least the other cat hacks up her hairballs where we can find them - and clean them up. Maybe this explains my allergies. Or maybe it was the first time she was sneak vomiting.